Apple Martin grew up with an “uneven balance” of normalcy as the daughter of Oscar-winning actress Gywneth Paltrow and Coldplay frontman Chris Martin.
The model, 20, admitted that being in the public eye made her “very anxious about making mistakes.”
“I grew up with that uneven balance of getting out of the airport with my mom and being bombarded with cameras, and then just being a normal kid,” she told Interview Magazine.
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“I remember I read ‘Discipline and Punish’ [by Michel Foucault], which is a great book, but talking about the surveillance state — I feel like I’ve grown up with that, which is really scary and makes me very anxious about making mistakes.”
Martin said that she was “discouraged from doing anything in the public eye.”
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“Also, I was like, ‘I don’t think we need another celebrity child in the world,’” she said. “I just try to do what feels right and block out anything regarding me in the news to the best of my ability.
“And I’m getting a lot better at being, like, ‘F— it.’ I’m not going to be scared. I just want to do what seems fun and figure my life out.”
Paltrow and singer-songwriter Martin started their family when Apple was born in 2004. Paltrow was pregnant at the time of their 2003 Santa Barbara Courthouse wedding, and they welcomed their son, Moses, in 2006.
In 2016, they divorced, and also coined the term “conscious uncoupling,” an ode to their interest in remaining a family unit without romantic ties.
Last year, Paltrow told her social media followers that she was struggling with being an empty nester after her children moved out.
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“I have waves of kind of grief and sadness,” she admitted. “And also I am kind of getting back in touch with this part of myself that I haven’t felt like since I was in my 20s, before I had kids.”
She tried to remain optimistic about the new opportunities at home without Apple and Moses around.
“[I have a] little more space and imagination, maybe? [A] little more inner space for like, what I might wanna do that day, and stuff like that,” she said. “So, it’s evolving. It’s interesting.”
Paltrow earned an Academy Award when she was 26 for “Shakespeare In Love” (1998), but stepped back from more serious roles to focus on being a mother.
“I really stepped away from acting when Apple was born,” Paltrow told People in 2023. “The last time I was in every scene of a movie was when I was pregnant with her. When I had her, it just, everything felt redefined for me, and I thought, ‘I’m not sure that I want to do this so much as a career. I definitely don’t want to… I’m not going to go away for months on end.'”
